THE CHOICE OF A GOOD HUSBAND:
A good husband can become your absolute companion, support and lifelong partner in both this world and the hereafter. A good husband is gentle to his wife, treats her nicely and respects her. The Prophet (P.B.U.H) said:
‘The most perfect of the believers in faith is he who is the most excellent of them in morals and the best of you are they who are best to their wives’. (Reported by At-Tirmidhi).
One of our Prophet (P.B.U.H’s) command insisted that a good husband will: ‘Act kindly towards women’.
A good husband will ensure his wives’ rights are fulfilled as much as possible:
Good company: Allah (S.W.T) says: ‘And live with them honourably’. (An-nisa:19).
Education: she is entitled to learn everything she wants in regard to the deen.
Dowry: Allah (S.W.T) says:
‘And give to the women (whom you marry) their dowry with a good heart; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it and enjoy it without fear of any harm (As Allah (S.W.T) has made it lawful)
(Surah An-Nisa:4).
Support: Allah (S.W.T) states:
‘But the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis. No person shall have a burden laid on him greater than he can bear’. (Surah Al-Baqarah:233).
To allow her to visit her parents, her family and her neighbours.
To treat her with kindness: A good husband will respect her feelings. To help his wife around the house etc. As the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H) used to ‘help his family; he used to mend his shoes, patch his clothes and sweep the floor’.
(Al-Hadeeth agreed upon).
A good husband will love his wife; he should call her by her best name and treat her deference. He has to treat her family kindly; exchange visits etc. Also, he should listen to her, respect her opinion and accept her advice if it was right. In short, any matter considered in our deen and tradition to be good should be adopted in their marriage relation.
In addition, he has to show noble character, endure her problems and show clemency in time of her recklessness and anger; more than that he has to joke and play with her because this makes her cheerful. The Prophet(P.B.U.H) used to joke with his wives. The husband should have a sense of humour to cheer his wife up, soothe her pains and to relieve her of the burdens of life and work because all this will strengthen the bonds of love and respect between them.
THE EXUBERANT HUSBAND:
Aisha (R.A) (The wife of our Prophet P.B.U.H) narrated that her and the Prophet (P.B.U.H) were out on a journey. The Prophet (P.B.U.H) said ‘come and race me’. Aisha
(R.A) said ‘I raced him on foot and I beat him, but on another journey, when i became bulky, he asked me to race him again and he beat me. He (P.B.U.H) started laughing and said: ‘this makes up for that beating’. (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Dawud and others).
In this race the Prophet (P.B.U.H) intends to teach the married couple ho to enjoy each other’s company. They could perform some innocent activities and entertainment together so that they would not feel bored and enjoy life together.
Finally, a good husband will always smile in front of his wife as vice versa. Also, a good husband will spend generously on his family where need be; as he knows whatever he spends on his wife intending to receive Allahs’ reward is regarded as an act of charity. |
